Want No!! (And Mama, You Can Check Yourself at the Door)

Roughly translated: "I do not want to do that/eat that/listen to you/follow instructions.

Usage:

Mama: "Reed, do you want to read Hippos Go Berserk?

Reed: "You want no!" (Specific Translation: "No, I do not want to read Hippos Go Berserk nor anything else you dare to suggest. If you don't suggest it, I might want it. Peace out, lady.")

Dada: "Reed, do you want some toast?"

Reed: "You want no!" (Specific Translation: "No, I do NOT want toast. Not if you're making it, and probably not if Mama's making it. Yes, I realize I want toast all the time, everyday, but . . . since you asked . . . no. No I do not. In case you still don't understand me, I'm going to whine along to the tune of the Mickey Mouse Hot Dog song and perhaps punch Mama in the face, just for kicks.")

"You" might be curious about that odd use of second-person. For a child so wildly articulate in so many ways, this has been a curious but ultimately endearing habit/trend: using second-person in place of first. The obvious answer is that, continually hearing himself referred to as "you", he refers to himself as "you". Simple enough. Yet Reed also refers to himself using the appropriate pronoun, and I'm pretty sure he knows the difference. Perhaps he's just trying to screw with our addled brains; it's not so difficult a mission accomplished in this household. But consider the following exchanges:

Mama: "I pick the scraper! What do you pick, Reed?"

Reed: "I pick the combine harvester! The snowplow is for Dada!"

Mama: "Okay, if Mama has the scraper, you have the combine harvester, and Dada's rocking the snowplow . . . what's left?"

Reed: "The grader!"

Mama: "That's right! You're pretty good with the process of elimination! Let's turn the page (of the newly cool truck books so callously abandoned in the not so distant past). Can Mama have the pick-up truck?"

Reed: "No. That's for Dada! That's not for YOU!"

Ahem. Alright. Fine. Dada rocks; Mama . . . ??? Whatever. In any case, I fail to see how the child who says "No. That's for Dada! That's not for YOU!" also screeches "You want no!" rather than, say, the linguistically sophisticated "I don't want it."

The universe is indeed one of divine mystery.